Look Towards Tomorrow
by Gazlover12-Canada
Summary: After Matthew tries to commit suicide, it leaves his family in shock. Now things are different, and his parents realize that he is a very special person. Now maybe Matthew wont be so broken, but it may take the courage of a friend to help him realize it. FACE Au, PruCan friendship!
1. Chapter 1

Today Matthew and Alfred had received their report cards. Alfred had gotten modest grades. His lowest was in English, which had been a D-. Other than that is was all B's and A's. He was pretty content with any grade, so long as he was passing. Grades never mattered that much to Alfred. Matthew on the other hand cared about school a lot. That was why he was so pleased when he got straight A's for the first time.

It had taken loads of late night studying and determination, but he had achieved the best of the best because of it. That was why he smiled for the whole rest of the school day, as well as the bus ride home. He couldn't wait to see the look on his parent's faces. Maybe now they would finally realize that he was just as good as, and maybe even better, then Alfred.

For two fourteen year old twins that almost looked exactly alike, they couldn't be any more different. While Alfred was the outgoing attention loving one, Matthew was the quiet and withdrawn child. He was never noticed at school, and hardly noticed at home. His Papa Francis was probably the one who he was closest too. His other dad Arthur was nice as well, but his attention was mostly focused on Alfred. Alfred himself did care about Matthew, but only at certain times. When they were at school Alfred became the center of the crowd, and he too forgot about his shy brother.

There was one thing that kept him holding on though. Alfred may have been the one who played baseball, soccer, and football, but there was a sport that Matthew played as well. He happened to be one of the best ice hockey players on the entire school team, despite only being a Freshman. His whole team loved him, including the coach. On the ice he was a completely different person. Quick, speedy, and skilled. Matthew loved every second of it. It did sometimes upset him when his parents forgot about his games, but they somehow always were able to attend Alfred's.

"Ah, hello boys," Arthur, their dad, greeted the twins as they came through the front door. "How was school?"

"Boring, no duh!" Alfred told him. "Except during lunch. Feliciano Vargas chocked on his pasta and Ludwig had to come to his rescue. It was hilarious!"

"Alfred F. Jones, chocking is not something to laugh about! That poor lad could have died!" Arthur scolded him.

"Sure, Sure," Alfred chortled. "So I was wondering if I could go hang with the guys today until dinner? We're all celebrating the start of the new quarter!"

"We'll see" Arthur replied. "First I want a look at your grades. I know for a fact that today was report card day."

"Aw, c'mon" Alfred whined, but handed his report card to the awaiting Brit. "They're actually pretty good dude!"

"I'll be the judge of that," Arthur said, eyes scanning the grades on the paper. Suddenly he scowled. "Alfred F. Jones, your English grade has dropped! I thought you told me you were working harder in that class. Haven't you been doing your homework?"

"Yeah dad I have been working harder! It's not my fault that it's so boring. And I have been doing my homework...most of the time."

"Mhm, I'm sure" Arthur agreed sarcastically. "Well you can forget about hanging out with those friends of yours. We're heading upstairs to do some major studying."

"Aw, but dad, I'll work harder!" Alfred told him.

"That doesn't matter. Before the school year ends I at least want you to bump up to a C. I won't have you failing." Arthur said, gesturing for Alfred to go upstairs. Before Arthur could follow however, Matthew spoke.

"Here's my report card Dad." He said, proudly handing his own grades to show him. Arthur scanned the paper quickly, and smiled.

"Good job lad" He told him, giving Matthew a quick pat on the shoulder. "Well, I'd best go try to help Alfred with his schooling."

As Arthur left to go upstairs, Matthew's pleased grin faded. God job? That was it? His grades were a thousand times better Alfred's! For a moment he just stood there, before finally heading upstairs to his own room, the place where he usually spent most of his time. It was covered with hockey posters and the Canadian flag, and on his bed sat his stuffed polar bear, Kumajiro. It had been a gift that Francis and Arthur had gotten him when he was first adopted by them. So what if he was fourteen and still carried around a stuffed animal? He loved his bear a lot.

During dinner was when Matthew felt his confidence come back a little. Now that his Papa was here, he could show his grades to him and hopefully get something better than a good job.

"So boys, how did you do with your grades?" Francis asked, taking a bite of the chicken he had made, since Arthur was banned from making meals.

"I got all A's Papa!" Matthew was quick to speak up before anyone else.

"How merveilleux! I am so proud of you, mon petit Mathieu!" The Frenchman squealed happily, reaching over to ruffle Matthew's hair. He smiled proudly, glad that he was finally getting some attention.

"Alfred on the other hand, just happens to be almost failing English." Arthur informed him, sending a frown at the other twin who was currently stuffing his face full of food.

"What? Mon dieu Alfred, I thought you were going to do better! We can't have you failing, or you'll have to retake the whole semester class!" Francis exclaimed.

Matthew sighed to himself in disappointment. There went his only hope of praise. Now the attention was turned to Alfred again, as usual. He finished his dinner as quickly as possible before heading upstairs. It was a Friday, but like normally he had no friends to hang out with. He settled for laying on his bed, staring up at the ceiling thinking of how much he wanted to be noticed. That was pretty much impossible though. It was a dream to unrealistic to ponder over too much. He couldn't help but allow a few tears to escape, slowly running down his cheeks.

That was the first night that Matthew stayed up till midnight. It was also the first time he traveled down to the kitchen to retrieve a small sharp knife from the silverware drawer. Most importantly of all, it was the first time Matthew attempted to cut himself.

**...**

Francis was a little bit concerned. It was nearing nearly eleven in the morning and Mathieu had yet to come downstairs. Normally Alfred was the twin to sleep in, but even he had woken up to come down for breakfast. After all, Saturday was doughnut day, and who didn't like doughnuts? Now Alfred was in the living room playing video games. Arthur was making tea in the kitchen, and Francis himself was contemplating why Matthew hadn't come downstairs. Perhaps he was sick or something.

"Mon lapin, I'm going to see if Mathieu wants me to make him some brunch. Then perhaps we can all go out and do something." Francis said.

"Alright, Sounds fine with me." Arthur responded. Francis went up the stairs and to the room at the end of the hall with a picture of a maple leaf on the door.

"Mathieu, wake up sleepy head! I shall make you come brunch and then we will all go out and do something." He called, knocking on the door. There was no response.

"Mathieu?" He knocked again, a frown on his face. He tried to open the door but discovered that it was locked. He froze. Matthew never locked his door.

"Mathieu open the door right now!" He called with his voice raised in worry, rattling the doorknob harder. Francis had this gut feeling that something was extremely wrong. Finally coming down to his last option, the Frenchman slammed his shoulder against the wooden door. It took a few tries, but eventually the door flung open. The sight that greeted Francis would haunt him forever.

Sitting on the floor slumped against his bed was Matthew. His face was pale, much too pale, and was covered in a sheet of sweat. The worst part was his arms. Thick red liquid that was obviously blood was covering his arms, dripping down his wrists and onto the floor. Matthew's eyes were glazed over, and a knife was still clasped in a limp hand.

"Mathieu? Oh my God! ARTHUR! CALL 911!" Francis screamed, running over to his son. "Mon dieu, please Mathieu, please hold on!"

"Francis what on earth..." Arthur trailed off as he came into the room, a cell phone in his hand. "Bloody hell!"

Arthur dialed for an ambulance while Francis gathered the nearly unconscious boy into his arms, sobbing and trying to stop the bleeding. Alfred had heard the commotion and came upstairs.

"M-Mattie? What did you do?" Alfred asked, lip trembling in shock and horror.

"Alfred, go downstairs!" Arthur snapped while trying to assist Francis in helping Matthew. "Let the paramedics in when they get here and show them the way."

Alfred numbly stepped from the room. It didn't take that long for an ambulance to arrive. Pretty soon they came up the stairs with a stretcher. For the first time Matthew actually reacted, flinching as he came to reality and realized what was happening.

"N-No!" He muttered weakly, shoving away at the new hands that touched him. "I d-don't care anymore...l-leave me alone! Don't touch me!"

Francis sobbed harder at the words, and even Arthur could stop from crying. Eventually Matthew was forced and strapped into the stretcher and loaded into the ambulance. Only one person was allowed to ride with him, so naturally it was Francis. Arthur and Alfred would meet them there.

The next few hours were horrible. Matthew's family sat in the waiting room, eagerly awaiting for the news of Matthew. Francis had stopped crying now, and held onto Arthur's hand tightly. Arthur used his other hand to gently run his fingers through Alfred's hair in a soothing gesture. When the doctor finally came to tell them the news, it was exactly what they dreaded.

"I'm afraid that Matthew is very depressed. He has woken up, but he won't talk to any if us. He will make a full recovery physically though." The doctor explained. "I don't know about mentally..."

"Mon dieu..." Francis whispered. "I just had no idea. I don't understand...he has seemed perfectly fine."

"Well I'm afraid that right now he isn't fine. You can see him if you would like, but I warn you that he's not very happy. I really would like your consent to keep him here under suicide watch for the next forty eight hours. He doesn't seem mentally stable." The doctor told them, a serious glint in his eyes.

"But...but shouldn't we take him home and support him there? He needs his family..." Arthur spoke.

"I can't keep you from taking him home, but I strongly advise to keep him here." The doctor replied.

"I...I think we should allow them to watch Mathieu here," Francis said slowly. "If it for the best then we must. I Don't want mon baby boy in danger."

It was decided that Matthew was to stay in the teenage crisis unit for at least 48 hours to be sure that he wouldn't try to kill himself. They were allowed to see him quickly, but Matthew was asleep.

Alfred was very disturbed by what his brother had done. When he and his parents had come back home, Arthur had a talk with Alfred and tried to explain to him that they would have to be very supportive and protective of Matthew once he came home.

"I'll be Mattie's hero," Alfred said confidently. "I'll protect him."

The next couple of days were quiet and depressing. Francis and Arthur didn't have to work since it was the weekend, and instead of going out with his friends Alfred stayed home close by. Finally on Monday, it was time to pick Matthew up from the hospital. It was just going to be Francis who picked him up so he wouldn't be overcrowded at first. Alfred was not going to school, and Francis and Arthur were each taking a few days off from work.

The doctor had called and reported that Matthew seemed okay for right now. He was prescribed with anti-depressants, and his parents were advised to keep an eye on his behavior. Matthew was also going to be set up with a professional psychiatrist to see twice a week starting on Wednesday. Some changes had to be made at the house. Or one, all of the knives and other sharp objects were locked away. Alfred was also going to move into Matthews room for the time being, to keep watch on him at night and keep him company.

When Francis arrived, he was very relieved to see his son alive. Matthew was dressed in sweatpants and his oversized red sweatshirt. It hid his freshly bandaged wrists. He was advised to have someone change the bandages once a night.

"Oh Mathieu, I've missed you so much!" Francis cried out, gently pulling the frail teen to his chest. He tried his best to keep back tears as he buried his nose in Matthew's soft hair. The teen smiled a little nervously, accepting the hug.

"I've missed you too Papa," He said softly. After holding onto each other for a little while longer, Francis finally led Matthew out to the car. The Frenchman tried to be as cheerful as possible, humming along to a song that was on the radio.

"I was thinking that we could get lunch before going home. What do you think? Seem like a good idea?" He asked.

"Oui Papa," Matthew answered quietly, looking down at his hands which were folded in his lap.

"Where do you feel like eating? There's seafood, Italian, Mexican...anything you want." Francis told him.

"I-I'm fine with anything." Matthew whispered once again, twisting his hands tighter and fidgeting. Francis saw the distress in the boys eyes and was quick to reassure him.

"Why don't we just get some sandwiches? You like those, non?" He suggested.

"Oui," Matthew answered him, looking a bit more relieved. Francis nodded happily and drove to a great sandwich place not too far from home. He allowed Matthew to sit in the car while he went in to pick up the food, but he felt paranoid, even though it only took less than ten minutes.

"I made sure to get an extra large for Alfred. I swear, that boys stomach is a bottomless pit," Francis said with a chuckle. He was glad to get a smile out of Matthew, even though it was little. He couldn't believe that his son was so broke. How could he and Arthur not have noticed? Just how long had Matthew been hiding his feelings from them?

What were they going to do now?

**a/n: I usually don't write really depressing things...but my big brother was picking on me and it put me in a depressing mood. Anyways, I hope it isn't terrible. I've always wanted to do a story centering around Canada, since I am so much like him. This will be a multi-chapter story if you want. I'm not sure if it's even good.**

**For the record, I am also working on my other stories too, I promise!  
**

**So anyway, let me know if this story is okay, pretty please? Do you guys want me to add more chapters?  
**


	2. Chapter 2

Things were very awkward for Matthew after coming home. As soon as he stepped into the living room with Francis he was crushed into a bone crushing hug by Alfred, and then Arthur made him let go so he could hug Matthew himself. Nobody was entirely sure what to do after that. The whole family just stood there awkwardly for a few moments in silence. Finally Matthew shuffled his feet and inched away from the group.

"I'm tired...I think I'm going to lie down," He told them, voice barely above a whisper.

"But...but you just got back," Francis said, panic filling him. He really didn't want Matthew going upstairs alone. What if he tried something again? After all, the doctor had told them to watch him carefully. Seeing how uncomfortable the teen looked, Arthur quickly came to the rescue.

"I'm sure Matthew just wants to unpack from his stay at the hospital. Why don't we eat first though? You can do that later." The Brit said, giving Matthew a sincere smile. It startled Matthew. Arthur never gave him that look...a look full of compassion and parental love. No, that look had always been for Alfred. It felt strange to be on the receiving side.

As the day slowly passed, Matthew realized how much the family was affected by what he had done. Not once had he found any type of object that was sharp enough to resemble a knife. All of the knives themselves were missing from the silverware drawers. There were a lot of other things different too. For instance, when Matthew had went back to his room he had discovered his lock was uninstalled from the doorknob. Besides that, someone was always with him, or at least very close by.

He had really messed everything up. Why had he even done it to begin with? It was sort of just a heat of the moment thing. He had held in his hurt for so long and then it all just exploded, which had caused him to harm himself.

Matthew's stay at the hospital had been pure hell. He had been forced to stay in a secluded part of the hospital surrounded by crazy people and nosy doctors. Hell, his roommate had been a sixteen year old cocaine addict! People watched him constantly, and he hadn't even been allowed to have shoelaces. Not only was it humiliating, but it also left Matthew actually wishing that he really was invisible. They made him speak during 'circle time' and he had to talk about why he tried to kill himself.

He closed his eyes and shuddered, desperately trying to push those memories from his head. At least now he was home, and hopefully things would soon return to normal. He tried to ignore the part of him that said things would never again be as they once were.

Now, two days later from when he got home, Francis and Arthur were taking him to his first appointment with Dr. Vainamainen, some Finnish psychiatrist he was going to be forced to speak with. Alfred was back at school now. He had wanted to stay home, but Arthur made him go back. They hadn't mentioned when Matthew would go back to school yet, and Matthew hadn't asked.

"Now mon petit, Arthur and I will get you settled with Dr. Vainamainen, and then we will get some pizza across the street while you two talk. How does that sound?" Francis asked.

"Fine, Papa" Matthew answered with a sigh. He really didn't want to be stuck talking with some weirdo who was paid to listen to all his problems. Hell, he didn't want to talk in general.

"It's alright lad, it'll only be for an hour. You'll be alright," Arthur told him comfortingly, patting him on the shoulder. The three family members went inside the tall brick building, and into the elevator, going all the way up to the sixth floor. The waiting room didn't look too bad. There were two couches and three armchairs. Not many people occupied the place. Arthur went towards the reception desk while Francis led Matthew to the couch.

"This place looks nice, non?" Francis said brightly, trying to make the best of the situation.

"Oui" Matthew muttered, looking down at his lap. After a few moments Arthur came and joined them, sitting on the other side of Matthew.

"Trust me lad, it'll be good for you. I had to talk to a psychiatrist in High School myself. People thought I was loony for talking to my fairy friends and teased me. I thought it was going to suck horribly, but it turns out that it was actually sort of fun. Those blokes let you say anything you want." Arthur said encouragingly. Matthew didn't respond, still looking downwards

"Is there a Matthew Williams present?" A cheerful voice chirped from the doorway. Matthew looked up to see what must have been Dr. Vainamainen. He was a fairly short man, with very blonde hair and violet eyes. He was smiling towards Matthew, so he must have already known that it was him. Francis stood, gently pulling the Canadian teen up as well.

"Go with the doctor Mathieu. Arthur and I will be here in the waiting room to pick you up in exactly an hour. No leaving the building, do you understand?"

"Oui, Papa" Matthew responded, trudging slowly across the room to where his psychiatrist was waiting. Once he reached the awaiting psychiatrist, Dr. Vainamainen smiled at him. "Let's go to my office, shall we?" He said, directing the teen through the hallways and into his office. Matthew appraised the room. It did look quite comfortable. There was a desk and two armchairs, with a coffee table as well. On the desk was a picture of the psychiatrist hugging a large and intimidating older man with glasses.

"So, why don't be both have a seat?" The psychiatrist suggested, gesturing towards the two armchairs. Matthew sat without complaint. He crossed his legs and wrung his hands together tightly. This whole situation felt very awkward. What would this man expect of him? Was he going to ask Matthew about the cutting, or how he almost died?

"As you probably already know, I'm Dr. Vainamainen. I know how long of a last name that is, so you can just stick to calling me Tino." The psychiatrist said, holding his hand out to shake. Matthew hesitated before slowly sticking out his arm and gripping Tino's hand. He then quickly withdrew his arm, tugging at his oversized sweatshirt sleeves so they hid his hands. He didn't want anyone to see the bandages, especially not this man. If Tino noticed what he was doing he didn't let on, instead just smiling warmly at him.

"I know all of this must be pretty weird. You can trust me though I'm not going to be like some interrogator and whatnot. We're just here to talk." Tino assured him.

"A-about what?" Matthew finally gathered up the courage to speak.

"Anything" Tino answered, eyes sparkling. "How about this. Tell me one interesting thing about yourself, and then I'll do the same. Stay at your own comfort level. You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to."

"Alright," Matthew said, swallowing. "Um...I play ice hockey."

"Ice hockey? Wow, that's great Matthew!" Tino said excitedly. "Are you on your school's team?"

"Yes," Matthew said with a nod.

"Excellent! Maybe I could come to one of your games sometime."

That shocked Matthew, but he smiled slightly. "O-okay."

"Cool," Tino said, leaning back into his chair. "Well I guess it's my turn now. Hmm...my favorite food is karjalanpiirakka. It's a finish pastry recipe my mother taught me when I was young. I make it for my husband and I often." Tino said with a grin. The psychiatrist's smile must have been contagious, for Matthew found himself smiling back.

"My favorite food is pancakes." He told him without hesitation.

"Pancakes? Nice! I have to agree, those are pretty delicious."

The hour actually passed by pretty quickly, much to Matthew's surprise. He had told Tino a lot about himself, but thankfully none of it involved the knife incident. He said goodbye and went back to the waiting room. Arthur and Francis hadn't come to pick him up yet, so he had a few minutes to himself, or so he thought.

"Is it alright if I sit here?" Someone asked. Matthew looked up into a pair of very odd red eyes that belonged to a teen who looked around his own age. Matthew stared at him for a second before realizing that the other teen was waiting for a response.

"S-sure," He said, flushing a bit. He wasn't used to strangers just coming up to him out of the blue. The teen sat next to him on the couch, fidgeting a bit before turning to Matthew with a grin.

"I'm Gilbert," He introduced himself. "So, are you being forced to talk to one of these whack jobs too?"

"Oh...um...I-I guess so," Matthew said a little awkwardly. "I just got done with my appointment with Tino. I'm waiting for my Papa and Dad to pick me up."

"Two dads, huh? That's totally awesome! Not as awesome as me though! It totally beats living with your Grandfather." Gilbert prattled on enthusiastically. Matthew was utterly baffled. How could this person, Gilbert, be so outgoing and full of confidence? Matthew was never able to strike up a conversation this casually.

Matthew opened his mouth to respond but found himself not knowing what to say. He settled for a dumb "Oh."

"You seem like a really quiet person. Is that why you're here? I'm here because mein Grandfather is making me. Apparently just because I enjoy vandalizing things and skipping school means I'm a troubled teen," Gilbert told him with a snicker. "What a load of shit. If anyone needs counseling then it's mein bruder. Luddie's thirteen which makes him two years younger than me, but the kid totally has issues."

"I have a brother too, except he's my twin." Matthew finally had the courage to say.

"A twin? Awesome! That must be cool." Gilbert exclaimed.

"Y-yeah. Kinda." Matthew said, muttering the last word. The albino teen seemed to have caught on and raised an eyebrow.

"It must be kind of annoying too, always having someone in the way, or being competitive." He said sympathetically. Matthew blinked, a bit surprised. Gilbert was the first person to ever really understand something like that. Hell, they had just met five minutes ago!

"You couldn't be more right."

Over the course of a few more minutes, Matthew found out a lot more about Gilbert. He went to an Alternative school just five minutes away from Matthew's own public high school. He also had an interest in hockey, but he didn't play on a team. Gilbert owned a small bird named Gilbird, which proved that he was very full of himself. Matthew liked that about him though, for some odd reason.

"Mathieu, I'm so sorry we're late! We lost track of time!" Francis cried in alarm, bursting through the door with Arthur right behind him. Matthew startled, before smiling.

"That's okay," He replied, standing up from his seat. He looked back at Gilbert. "I guess I'll see you around."

"Hell yeah! We should get together and play hockey sometime." Gilbert suggested.

"Okay!" Matthew said, starting to feel a bit excited. He had just made a friend...hopefully! He said goodbye quickly before he was ushered from the room by his parents and back into the elevator.

"So how was it?" Arthur finally asked.

"It was...nice." Matthew told them.

"Who was that boy you were talking to?" Francis wondered.

"Oh, that was Gilbert. He has to see Tino too." Matthew told them. "We might play hockey sometime."

* * *

Over the course of the days, Matthew slowly fell into the pattern of the new changes. Francis and Arthur purchased plastic forks, knives, and spoons. Francis claimed that it was to save money, but Matthew obviously knew the truth. He also had to adjust to his new current roommate, Alfred. His brother had moved his bed into his room, right up beside Matthew's own bed. Sometimes he would be awoken in the middle of the night by Alfred. The older twin would awaken Matthew to make sure he was alright.

"Papa, I would like to go back to school," Matthew said, two days after his appointment with Tino. He had realized how much work he was missing, and didn't want his grades to go to waste after working so hard to get straight A's.

"W-what?" Francis asked, almost dropping the potato he'd been peeling.

"I don't want to be behind on my studies," Matthew told him, shoulders hunched as he began to feel self conscious from his Papa's reaction. He acted as if he didn't _want_ Matthew to go back to school.

"Maybe you should wait a few more days...just to get back into the routine of things. I just...the doctor said you shouldn't be stressed, and I know school can be stressful. It's just that...I don't want you to...to try _that_ again." Francis told him, clearly struggling over his words. Matthew felt himself flush. Had his stunt scared his family that much?

"I wont. School doesn't make me stressed out. It just k-keeps me busy." Matthew claimed. His words were true. Going back to school meant returning to hockey once again. He had to get ready for the upcoming game. If he missed it then his whole team would be disappointed. After all, it was the first game of the season.

"Well, I'll have a talk with your dad. We'll see." Francis said slowly. Matthew nodded and smiled a little. For some odd reason his talk with Gilbert in the waiting room had boosted his confidence. He had no clue why, but at least that was a good thing. He wandered out of the kitchen and into the living room. Out of nowhere, he was attacked by am arm slinging over his shoulder.

"Hey Mattie, wanna join me for the video games?" Alfred asked.

"No, that's okay. I have to get my things ready for school tomorrow." Matthew informed him. Alfred blinked.

"You're coming back to school?" He asked with a frown. "Dad told me they were keeping you home. You're not supposed to come back to school yet." He said with a frown.

"I'm going back tomorrow." Matthew said with as much confidence as he could muster. The way everyone was reacting was causing him to loose some of it.

With that, Matthew turned and went upstairs to pack his backpack.

* * *

"I'm going to pick you up at exactly four o'clock, right when your hockey practice ends. Alfred will be at basketball practice, which means that he will be right in the gym nearby. You are not to wander anywhere else, alright? If you have any problems or just want to come home, call me right away and me or Arthur will be there to get you in a heartbeat. I also want you to text me in between classes, alright?" Francis asked worriedly only minutes before Matthew and Alfred were to go outside and meet the bus.

"Oui, Papa. I'll be fine." Matthew said with a sigh. Honestly, it was weird now that everyone was paying so much attention to him. Before the _incident_ had occurred, Arthur and Francis barely even noticed whenever he was gone.

"We just want to make sure you're safe, lad." Arthur told him, smiling sadly. "Alfred, make sure to stick close by to your brother today. Oh yeah, good luck on that English quiz too. You better at least get above a D."

"Sure dad, I totally got this." Alfred said. "C'mon Mattie, we don;t want to miss the bus."

Matthew took a deep breath and followed his brother out the door.

**a/n: How was this? Not terrible I hope.**

**Thank you for all the reviews so far. They made me very happy. So I introduced Gilbert in this chapter, as well as Tino. They will play a big role in this story along with Matthew's family. The plot will get more interesting within the next chapter or so, I promise.**

**Please tell me if you like it!**


	3. Chapter 3

Hetalia High was no different then normal. The large three story brick building was as tall as ever. Students of all different ages were socializing with their friends as usual throughout the halls. Matthew stood by his locker, putting away his books. He had done a lot of makeup work while at home, even though he still had a week left to do it, but already he had finished.

"Hurry up Mattie, the bells gonna ring in less then five minutes and I still have to go to my own locker," Alfred told him impatiently. It seemed that the teen was taking his job very seriously. Not once had he left Matthew's side.

"Honestly Al, you don't have to stay so close," Matthew said, shaking his head at how silly his brother was being. "Besides, you're going to have to leave my side eventually. We don't have any classes together."

"Dammit, I forgot about that!" Alfred hissed to himself in realization. "Well maybe we can-"

"Al, _I'm fine_," Matthew said, emphasizing to make it clear to Alfred that he wouldn't try to kill himself during school. "Trust me, okay?"

Alfred hesitated, hanging his head down. "I just want you to be safe Mattie," He muttered. Matthew began to feel all the more guilty. He should have never acted on impulse with that damned knife. Because of his actions everything was ruined, for better or for worse.

"I will be safe. Listen to me Al, I won't do anything stupid. After all, I have hockey practice to get to later." Matthew told him lightly.

"Yeah but-" Alfred's words were interrupted by a few of his friends calling his name from down the hall. Matthew gave him a grin.

"See, your friends need you. I'll be fine here. See you after school." Matthew said, shoving the last of his things into his locker except for his history textbook. Alfred hesitated, looking back at his friends. They waved to him in a gesture to come over and join them.

"Well...alright. Just call if you need me, okay? The hero wont let you down!" Alfred told him, patting his brother on the back before running over to join his friends. Matthew sighed to himself. He might as well get the day over with. At least he would have hockey after school.

Matthew could never ever hate hockey. While he was on the ice people noticed him. They actually cheered for him. Only on the ice though...other than that nobody noticed him. Ever his teammates forgot him during regular school hours, and it didn't help that he was the youngest on the hockey team. He was the only Freshman on the team. Sometimes he would get it into his head that his team only liked him for hockey, but he tried not to let it get to him. At least he got attention while on the ice.

School was as bland as ever. Most of his teachers didn't even realize he was back until he stood up and turned in his extra work. His classmates barely paid him any mind, but that was just like usual. He did notice a person give him a pitying glance every once in awhile, which made him freeze. Did people know what he had done? Surly Alfred wouldn't tell anyone...or at least not on purpose. Matthew also kept his promise and texted Francis in between every class.

"I wrote down some history notes for you," Carlos Machado, a boy who had moved here from Cuba, said during third period Geometry class that day. Normally most Freshman took Algebra 1, but since Matthew was pretty good with grades and such, he was placed in the better math class.

"O-oh. Thank you," Matthew said, taking the papers from his classmate.

"If you ever need anything then just give me a holler. My dad owns an ice cream store. Feel free to stop by anytime. We'll give you a discount!" Carlos said with a smile. Matthew thanked him again before turning his attention to the teacher.

Thankfully after fourth period at two o'clock, school ended. Matthew raced to the locker rooms so he could get changed and go to the ice rink.

"Hey Matt, you're finally back!"

"Welcome back man!"

"Finally! We've missed you out on the rink!"

His teammates all greeted him enthusiastically. Matthew smiled and greeted them back before heading to one of the stalls to change. The other hockey players just shrugged to themselves. Matthew didn't want anybody to see the bandages though. He was quick to put on his uniform and other gear before joining the others on the walk to the rink.

Hetalia High School was certainly wealthy for a public school. It had two gyms, as well as a private indoor ice rink that was used for ice hockey as well as ice skating. Matthew was currently heading there now. Once at the rink his coach, Mr. Sims, beamed upon seeing him.

"Matthew, glad you could join us once again. The team just hasn't been the same without you," The coach said, clasping him on the shoulder.

"It's good to be back sir," Matthew replied with a grin.

He spent the next two hours on the ice, right where he belonged. His thoughts were drawn away from all the recent trouble and problems that had occurred. When the coach dismissed them after a short pep talk about the upcoming game, Matthew then raced quickly to get changed. Francis was already in the parking lot, and Alfred was done with his own practice.

"You can have shotgun," Alfred told him as they both went to get into the small red car that their French parent owned. Francis looked very relieved to see Matthew alive and well. He smiled, gently using a hand to move Matthew's messy hair from his eyes.

"How was practice? You both look exhausted," Francis exclaimed fondly, chuckling at Alfred and Matthew's tired faces and tousled hair.

"Yeah, my practice was brutal! The coach had us run three miles, and then we had to do burpies and crunches. He really wants us in shape!" Alfred said. "Now I'm starved!"

"Not to worry Alfred, we're having tacos for dinner tonight," Francis informed him, laughing at Alfred's excited whoop. He then turned his attention to the more quiet teen. "How did hockey go for you, _mon cher_?"

"It was great Papa. We're getting ready for our upcoming game," Matthew told him.

"Really now? And when is this game going to happen?" Francis asked curiously. Matthew blinked. Francis had never had an interest in when his games were before. He and Arthur had always just watched Alfred play sports.

"Oh, um, next Saturday," He responded, a little embarrassed for no reason.

"Really now? Well perhaps Arthur and I can attend. I would just love to watch you play."

"O-okay," Matthew said, allowing a smile to grace his lips. So Francis and Arthur might watch one of his games? Maybe there was hope to his life yet.

* * *

"Erm...why are we doing this again?" Matthew asked with some hesitation.

"To explore your artistic side! You know, a lot expression can come out of paintings. We might discover something that you didn't even know about yourself in the first place!" Tino said enthusiastically, passing Matthew some water color paints.

"Er, right" Matthew said, clearly not believing his therapist.

It was Saturday, and Matthew was at his second appointment with Tino. Today apparently the cheerful Finn wanted them both to paint. He claimed that it was something soothing to do, and that it might teach Matthew things about himself. The teen really didn't think he was going to enjoy since he had never been that artistic, but then again at least it would take up the time for their hour long appointment.

"Your parents told me that you went back to school. I'm so proud of you!" Tino spoke up as they both painted.

"You seem like the only one who is," Matthew muttered, but not quiet enough, for Tino's eyebrows drew together.

"Hmm? Why would you say that?" He asked.

"Both of my parents, as well as my brother, didn't seem too keen to let me go back to school. Especially my Papa." Matthew told him quietly. It was silent for a moment as Tino pondered to himself.

"Maybe that isn't necessarily a bad thing. After all, that means they care about you," Tino pointed out.

"Perhaps. But they have never been this protective before. It only started after...the incident." Matthew told him.

"Ah, I understand," Tino said in understanding. "When something happens that puts their child in danger, it can really bring out the protective side of a parent. I know myself. After my son almost drowned I was afraid to let him near the water for weeks. It took a lot of reassurance from both my son as well as my husband."

"You have a son?" Matthew asked in surprise.

"Yes, his name's Peter. He'll be nine this January," Tino said happily, showing Matthew a picture of a small boy in a sailor suit. The teen smiled sadly, tracing his fingers over the picture. Peter looked so happy. Matthew wasn't surprised though, Tino seemed like he would be an excellent parent.

"I guess...but..." Matthew struggled over what to say. "What I did is different. I suppose when it happened, I didn't think about how my family would react. I made a big mistake, and now I don't think things will ever be the same."

"Everybody makes mistakes Matthew" Tino told him warmly. "Some mistakes may be bigger then others, but there is always a way to fix them."

"How? How could I possibly fix something that already happened?" Matthew asked, dipping his brush into the red color and swirling it around on the paper. His light and happy colors were messed up by red now, and it reminded Matthew of how much blood there had been on _that day_.

"Well, there are plenty of ways. If I were you, I would let your parents in. Let them try to understand you. Perhaps you can teach them a few lessons about yourself." Tino said. "It could be a two on two thing. They can learn and realize how amazing their son is, and you can learn how much they really do care."

Matthew swallowed, looking away. Tino reached out and rested a hand on his shoulder.

"I'm not going to force you to talk about what happened that night," The Finn said quietly. "But when you are ready to talk about it, I'll listen, and most importantly I'll never judge you."

"Thanks" Matthew responded after a moment. "I just...I'm just not ready yet."

"I know," Tino told him. "And that's perfectly fine."

* * *

"Hey Matthew, long time no see!" Gilbert greeted him upon coming into the waiting room. Matthew's session had finished a few minutes early so once again he was waiting to be picked up.

"Oh, hello Gilbert," Matthew said back, a smile working it's way onto his face. He had thought a lot about Gilbert since their last meeting, and he had sort of hoped to run into the albino at his next appointment. Apparently luck was on his side. Gilbert took a seat next to him on the same exact couch as last time. For a moment neither of them spoke before Gilbert shoved a small piece of paper into Matthew's hand.

"Here," He said. "It's my house address. You should come by tomorrow so we can play hockey."

"Oh," Matthew said, a bit stunned. He hadn't been invited over somewhere in years, mostly due to the fact that he had never had any close friends. He didn't even know Gilbert that well, but that was what hanging out and playing hockey was for. Maybe they would be able to become friends. "Okay. What time should I come by?"

"Any time you want, though sometime after noon would be better. I enjoy sleeping in on weekends." Gilbert told him.

They spent another five minutes talking about random things before Arthur came in, quietly waving to Matthew. Francis wasn't there, since he was preparing supper at home. Matthew hoped that the car ride home wouldn't be awkward or anything. He and Arthur had never really been as close as Arthur was with Alfred.

"So, did you have a nice time with your psychiatrist?" Arthur asked once they were in the jeep, otherwise known as Arthur's source of transportation.

"Yeah. Tino had us paint." Matthew told him.

"Paint? Wow, I never knew you were artistic Matthew." Arthur said, sounding a bit impressed.

"Er, I'm not" Matthew said with a chuckle. "Tino said it was to express myself or something. I tried painting a polar bear but I think it ended up looking more like a jellyfish."

"Nothing to worry about lad. I'm not very good at art myself, unlike Francis," Arthur said, laughing loudly. Matthew chuckled under his breath too. Inside Arthur was really happy. After having Matthew almost die, the Brit had begun to realize how far apart he and the younger twin were. He wanted to try and connect with Matthew, and have a better father-son relationship.

Now maybe they were getting somewhere.

* * *

"Non Mathieu, I do not think that is a good idea," Francis said sadly, shaking his head. Matthew's mouth dropped open in disbelief. They had just finished dinner and he brought up how Gilbert wanted him to come over for a few hours and play hockey. Much to Matthew's shock, his papa didn't approve of it.

"But why not?" Matthew asked.

"It's too soon," Francis told him, shaking his head. "I don't want you anywhere but school or the ice rink. At least not for a few weeks. By then the medication should be helping, and I will feel better with you going out of my sight."

"Papa, I wont do anything. I wont try to do _that_ again." Matthew said as truthfully as he could. Honestly, he wasn't going to try killing himself again! At least not anytime soon. Right now he wanted to actually make a friend, and this was the best chance he could get.

"I promise to let you go in a few weeks. Until then, non." Francis said in a tone that obviously meant the discussion was ended. Matthew sighed, turning around to go upstairs.

"Hey, wait up Mattie!" Alfred called, running after him. Midway up the stairs Matthew stopped, wheeling around to face his brother.

"Don't follow me, I want to be alone! Why can't you fucking understand that?" Matthew said, voice raised. Alfred blinked, taking a step downwards. Matthew had never spoke to him like that before. Hell, as far as Alfred knew, Matthew had never even swore before in his life. Hurt clearly was shown on Alfred's face, but Matthew guiltily ignored it. He had to get his brother to understand, or anyone to understand that he wasn't going to kill himself!

"A-Alright..." Alfred finally muttered, eyes downcast.

"Fine. Thanks." Matthew said a little softer than before. With that he turned and proceeded to go upstairs to his room, the door slamming behind him. Arthur and Francis had heard the entire conversation between the two brothers, and Francis began to get very worried. Matthew had never spoken so angrily to someone before.

"...Maybe you should have let him go..." Arthur commented quietly from his seat at the kitchen table.

"Non! I wont have him in danger. Right now he is a danger to himself. I want the antidepressants to help him first." Francis said firmly, casting a glare at his husband. "Please understand me mon lapin. I cannot lose mon Mathieu. I wasn't paying enough attention before, and now I am. I only want what's best for him."

It was quiet for a moment, and then Arthur sighed.

"Your right Francis. I'm sorry." He said, using one hand to rub his temples. "Bloody hell, why did this whole thing have to happen? Everything seemed to perfect before."

Francis could agree more, which is why he dialed Dr. Vainamainen's number.

"...He's just never been this angry before!" Francis spoke into the phone, clutching it tightly. "But if I allow him to hang out with some boy who he's only talked to twice, then how am I supposed to keep an eye on him? He might try to hurt himself again, especially since he's so angry now!"

"I don't think you need to worry about Matthew harming himself," Tino said after a few seconds. "Personally I think it's great that he's angry!"

"...Come again?" Francis asked, confused.

"Seriously! Before, he was keeping all of his hurt inside and not showing any emotion. Matthew is now expressing his emotions in a different way. This means that he's less likely to snap. You see Mr. Bonnefoy, keeping the hurt inside and holding it i can only work for so long. Eventually you snap and do something regretful, which is exactly what Matthew did. He may be angry right now, but isn't that better than him not letting you know his feelings at all?"

"Oh," Francis said, a bit shocked now. The Finnish doctor was actually making a bit of sense. "Maybe you're right. But what should I do? Let him go hang out with this Gilbert boy, or keep him home for a bit longer?"

"Well, I can't make that decision for you I'm afraid. It's up to you. From experience, Gilbert is a good boy. He might be able to help Matthew out." Tino informed him.

"You know this Gilbert?" Francis asked.

"Mhm. I happen to be his counselor as well. He may seem a bit rough around the edges, but he isn't a bad person. He just needs a bit of guidance. Maybe Matthew can teach him that. They can both help each other." Tino said brightly. "Well, I need to get my son ready for bed. Good night Mr. Bonnefoy, and good luck!"

"Merci," Francis said, hanging up the phone. He stood there for a moment, deep in thought. Maybe...maybe he should allow Matthew to go to Gilbert's house tomorrow. Dr. Vainamainen seemed to approve of it. But then again he said that it was up to Francis himself. It was a very hard choice. Matthew hadn't been home for a whole week and already he wanted to go somewhere else. It was a scary thing. Finally he came to a decision.

"Arthur, I think I've changed my mind. Maybe making a friend would be good for him. That's what Dr. Vainamainen said anyway. I think I'll go tell him." Francis told Arthur. The Englishman smirked.

"Excellent idea. How about you have Matthew come downstairs? We can have all watch a movie or something, as a family."

"Wonderful idea!" Francis said, beaming. "I'll go get him right now."

* * *

Matthew was sulking on his bed, already dressed in baggy sweatpants and a dark blue hoodie to sleep in instead of his red one. None of this was fair! He wanted to go to Gilbert's house. This had been his only chance to make a friend, and his papa had ruined it. Now what was he supposed to do? Gilbert had only written his address, he hadn't given a number or anything. Now it was going to look like Matthew totally blew him off. Before he could think about anything else, there was a knock at his door.

"Come in," Matthew called, rolling his eyes. It was probably Alfred coming in to 'be a hero' or some shit like that.

"Mathieu? Mon cher, I need to talk to you." Francis said, opening the door.

"Oh great, even worse then Alfred," Matthew muttered to himself. "Papa, can't I be alone right now?"

"You can go to Gilbert's tomorrow. But only for a few hours," Francis said aruptly, walking over to sit next to Matthew on the bed. The teen's eyes brightened instantly. Was this really happening? Why would his papa change his mind so fast?

"Really papa? Do you promise?"

"Yes mon petit, I promise. Now come here," Francis said with a smile, holding out his arms. Matthew accepted the hug. He was never hugged that often, but it did always make him feel comforted. Recently after his stunt, people had been hugging him a lot more.

"Merci, papa!" Matthew thanked him.

"Of course. Now how about we change your bandages and then go downstairs? Arthur suggested a movie night, and I fully agree that we should." Francis suggested.

"Alright," Matthew agreed. He followed his papa out to the bathroom. It was a routine for Francis to change his wrist bandages nightly until they were healed enough. It was always uncomfortable each time, but he was beginning to grow used to it. He drew up his long sleeved to reveal heavily bandaged wrists. Francis took down the first aid kit before proceeding to unwrap them from Matthew's wrists.

"Hmm, it looks like they're finally starting to heal," Francis said quietly, carefully inspecting the cuts. There were three on each of Matthew's wrists. They weren'that long, but each of them were very deep. Matthew always squeezed his eyes shut rather than view them. It pained Francis to look to them, but he had to. He wasn't going to make anyone else do it.

"That's good," Matthew replied softly, refusing to look down at his mangled wrists. Neither of them spoke while Francis applied more antibiotics and rewrapped the wounds in new clean bandages. Once he was done, Matthew pulled down his sleeves and breathed a sigh of relief.

"Well, let's go on downstairs, shall we?" Francis said, putting an arm around Matthew's shoulders as he led him out of the bathroom.

That night they watched Spiderman 2. The family of ofur all sat on the couch. Arthur and Francis were next to each other, bundled under a blanket. Matthew laid with his head on Franci's lap, and Alfred was in the same position except his head was on Arthur's lap. It was just like when they had been younger.

For the first time in months, they acted like a real family.

**a/n: This chapter was longer than the others, yay! So how long do you guys think this should be? I was thinking around ten or so chapters, maybe more. What do you guys think? Also, sorry that Gilbert wasn't in there a lot. The next chapter will have so much of Gilbert's awesomeness that it'll make your head spin. **

**I absolutely adored all of your reviews. Thank you so much! Please tell me what you think about this chapter!**

**NOTE: For those of you who read my other stories, Not Feeling Well will be updated soon, and so will Alternate Universe: Before and After! Probably sometime within the next few days if all goes well.  
**

**Thanks again to everyone who had been reading this!  
**


	4. Chapter 4

"Do you have your cell phone?" Francis double checked for the third time that day.

"Oui Papa," Matthew replied with a sigh. Right now he sat in the passengers seat of the car, with Francis in the drivers seat. They were parked in Gilbert's driveway. He was only allowed to stay for three hours, and he hat to text Francis every hour, but it would still be worth it.

"Alight then...I'll be here at exactly three okay?" Francis told him.

"Right. Can I please get out of the car yet?" Matthew asked with a sigh.

"Oui. Have a fun time Mathieu." Francis said, though inside he was feeling very reluctant about letting his son go hang out with a boy whom he'd never even met himself. Matthew nodded in thanks and got out of the car, waving to his Papa. Gilbert then stepped out of his house.

"Hey, finally! I've been waiting for like, ten minutes!" The albino teen said, grinning happily as if he'd won the lottery.

"Sorry. My Papa just needed to talk to me about something," Matthew apologized, shifting awkwardly. Thankfully Gilbert just laughed and slung an arm around his shoulder.

"Come on inside and see the house. We can have something to eat and then play some hockey," He said, leading Matthew inside. The house was pretty large on the outside, painted a normal white. The inside of the house looked nice too, and actually pretty clean.

"This is the living room...and here's the kitchen...oh, and come see my room!" Gilbert prattled off as he showed Matthew the house. They trotted up the stairs to the first room on the right. The door had a large crack in the wall, and Matthew briefly wondered how it had gotten there.

The room itself was nice. It was moderate sized, with dark blue walls and wood flooring. There was a twin sized bed shoved into a corner not far away from a TV, which was a game console hooked up to it with numerous game cases scattered on the floor in front of it. There were a few different clothes articles on the floor, but other than that it was clean. Matthew also noticed a rather large birdcage, and inside was a yellow bird.

"Well, what do you think? Awesome right?" Gilbert spoke up as Matthew looked around the room.

"Yeah, it's really cool," Matthew told him, smiling a little. "Better than my room."

"Ksesese, you'll have to show me your room sometime. Oh hey, wanna meet mein bruder?" Gilbert asked.

"Oh um...sure!" Matthew replied.

"Awesome! Follow me!" The albino told him, grabbing Matthew's arm and dragging him across the hall to another room. He opened the door without even knocking, revealing the inside of a bedroom that looked...clean. Very clean. The walls were white, not once single smudge on them. The floors were carpeted and looked just recently vacuumed. There was a bed that was neatly made, a desk with some perfectly piled papers, and a small television in the corner of the room.

"Bruder, why don't you ever knock!" A teenage boy, who must have been Ludwig, grumbled angrily from his desk chair that he sat in. Matthew got a better look at him. He didn't look anything at all like Gilbert, and instead had neatly slicked back blonde hair, icy blue eyes, and looked well fit for a kid his age. If Matthew remembered correctly, Gilbert had mentioned that Ludwig was only in 8th grade.

"Luddie, I want you to meet my new friend Mattie!" Gilbert said enthusiastically.

"You're friends with mein bruder? I feel sorry for you..." Ludwig muttered under his breath, but it was heard by Gilbert who yelled, "Heeey!"

For a few moments the siblings bickered, almost forgetting that Matthew was in the room. He stood there awkwardly until the other too had let out their steam.

"Er...can you two please go somewhere else? Felicinao is coming over soon, and I want to do some last minute cleaning," Ludwig finally said.

"Ksesese, that weird Italian? Isn't he a Freshman?" Gilbert asked, snickering. "Any bruder, your room is already clean, way too clean! Didn't I tell you he has problems Mattie?"

"You were talking about me behind my back?" Ludwig asked, but his words were unheard since Gilbert dragged his friend out of the room quickly to get something to eat.

"So er...where's your Grandfather? Don't you live with him?" Matthew finally questioned something that he'd been wondering for awhile.

"Oh...he's somewhere. Be thankful that you haven't had to meet him yet. He always favors Luddie over me, it's so unawesome! But things have been a little better between us, probably since I haven't gotten in trouble with the law or anything recently." Gilbert said, leading Matthew into the kitchen.

"I'm sorry," Matthew said sincerely. He understood what it was like to have a sibling who was favored more. At least he got along with his parents though, when they noticed him.

"Pfft, don't be. Anyway, what do you want to eat? We have some wurst I think..."

The rest of the day went by rather fast. After eating their snacks, Gilbert and Matthew played hockey in the driveway. Gilbert had all sorts of equipment, even more than Matthew himself. They were pretty evenly matched, but Matthew still often had the better hand due to how fast he was.

"Wow, dude you're an awesome hockey player! Of course I'm still the most awesome at everything else, but maybe I'll allow you to be the awesomest at hockey." Gilbert said as they both took a water break.

"I play on my schools hockey team. That's about the only time when people notice me...when I'm helping the team win." Matthew said ruefully.

"What do you mean nobody notices you? Why not?" Gilbert asked, eyebrows raised. Matthew took a sip of water and wiped the sweat from his forehead. It was pretty hot out, and wearing his sweatshirt didn't help.

"It's always been my twin brother Alfred who gets noticed. He plays practically every sport besides hockey, he attracts girls from left and right, and he's just a huge outgoing jock. It doesn't really help that my parents always seem to remember him instead of me. I've always just been the quiet kid who sits in the back of the classroom. My teachers don;t even remember my name..." Matthew said, trailing off. It then occurred to him that he'd never once said this much to his parents, or Tino, or anybody. It felt sort of good to get it out.

"Gee, that really fucking sucks. That's a lot worse then my life, and it's totally unfair. Your a great person, and whoever doesn't notice you just isn't awesome enough." Gilbert said,

"Thanks Gil," Matthew said, a little surprised, and also pleased.

"No problem," Gilbert said. It was silent for a moment before the albino spoke again, but this time a little more hesitantly. "Hey Mattie...why do you have to talk to Tino? Does it have to do with that?"

At first Matthew didn't answer, but them came to a conclusion. Gilbert seemed to have understood him more than anyone else, even his Papa. That was why he slowly pulled up his sleeves, revealing two thin wrists wrapped thickly in bandages. There was silence, neither teen speaking. Matthew was starting to worry that now Gilbert would think he was stupid, and a freak, and just a total loser. All of those worries vanished though, when Matthew was suddenly enveloped into a warm hug. He was shocked to say the least. The two of them stayed like that for a few moments, until Gilbert silently drew back.

"Don't ever do something like that again Matthew. It's not worth it. A lot of people would miss you, especially me." Gilbert told him quietly.

* * *

"So, how was it?" Francis asked once Matthew was back in the car safe and sound. The whole three hours had Francis very worried. Thankfully Arthur was able to keep him distracted...in a very good way.

"It was very fun Papa. We played a lot of hockey...and he showed me his house." Matthew responded. "He invited me over again next week. Can I go?"

"Oh...well...alright." Francis agreed, a little shocked. The more he thought of it, Matthew had barely ever hung out with friends before. He didn't even remember Matthew having anybody over before, which just showed what a crappy parent he had been.

"Merci!" Matthew said, and then he got out of the car since they had just pulled into their own driveway. He was probably the happiest person on the planet right now.

He had finally made a friend,

A friend who understood him.

**a/n: Sorry it's so short! I still hope it was alright. A few new characters will be introduced in the next chapter, just you wait! Anyway, thanks for all your outstanding reviews, I love you guys! Sorry my updates are a little slower than normal, I'm just outside a lot with friends living it up before I have to go back to school...lol. I'll be updating quicker soon!**


	5. Chapter 5

**I am SO sorry that this took awhile. I've been quite busy now that schools starting. Never fear though, now I'm back into having enough time to type! So once again, expect lots of updates for all of my stories! Enjoy!**

Hanging out with Gilbert had left Matthew feeling a lot better. He was certainly happier than he'd been in awhile. The only real thing that got him irritated was home. His parents and brother still hadn't let up on their...protectiveness. It was still plastic forks and knives at dinner, Arthur and Francis' shaving razors were hidden somewhere, and Francis still fretted every time Matthew set foot outside the house.

Thing thing that kept Matthew's spirits up was Gilbert. In only three days would he go back, and they would play hockey again. Though they had really only hung out outside the waiting room once, Matthew still felt himself grow close to the albino teen over the course of those few hours. Gilbert...he just _got it_. He completely understood.

Now Matthew was sitting comfortably on the couch after a long day of school, scribbling away at his geometry homework. His mind wasn't exactly on the schoolwork, more so wandering towards other things. He wondered what they would do at his next appointment with Tino. He wondered what he and Gilbert would talk about when they hung out this Sunday. His mind was interrupted by a hand ruffling his hair.

"Hello mon petit. I just wanted to let you know that I'm running to the grocery store quickly. Alfred's upstairs and Arthur will be home from work in fifteen minutes." Francis said, staring down at his son anxiously, as if he were afraid Matthew would slit his wrists the moment he walked out the door. Suddenly Matthew felt the sudden need to go out.

"Erm...Papa, may I please go with you?" He asked a little nervously. Thankfully though Francis grinned, looking very happy.

"Why of course you can Mathieu! I would be delighted to have you accompany me to the grocery store. Is there any paticular reason though? You haven't wanted to willingly go grocery shopping since you and Alfred were little." The Frenchman replied, a little curious.

"I'm not exactly sure," Matthew replied, completely truthful. It was just this sudden urge to get up on his feet and go someplace else besides school. Even if it was just a plain old grocery store, it was still a change of scenery.

Matthew followed Francis into the car. It was a little cold because of the chilly weather, since it was now November. He wore his usual red hoodie though, both to keep warm and to cover his scars. Just last night he had removed the bandages. On each wrist there were two jagged puffy scars, making a total of four cuts in all. They were almost perfectly healed, but the scars would be there forever.

He didn't want anybody to see. Matthew felt ashamed, embarrassed, and just plain at fault. He was the new cause of worry in his family now. He had turned their smooth road of family life into a new road of cracks and bumps. He had ruined everything, all because of the fact that he'd acted on impulse for his own needs. Matthew concluded to himself that it had been a very stupid move.

"Let's see...we need creamer for my coffee, ketchup, eggs, and of course we can't forget mon lapin's tea." Francis murmured to himself as they entered the store. He picked up a shopping basket and gestured for Matthew to follow him.

"So Mathieu, how was school today? Did you do anything interesting?" Francis asked as they walked through the isles in search of the items.

"It was alright," Matthew answered with a shrug. "Were preparing for a big test in geometry, but I think I know most of it."

"Well that's good! You've always been the more productive one when it comes to school. Even when you were younger...I remember this one time before you and Alfred's first day of Kindergarten, I caught you up the night before going over all of your numbers and letters." Francis said, chuckling in remembrance.

Their time at the store passed by quickly, and Matthew felt himself fall into a more comfortable ease as he and his French parent make idle conversation. He had always found it hard to have a full conversation with someone. The easiest person to talk to was Tino, but then again it was Tino's job to listen and talk with him. It seemed to be a bit easier now talking to his papa. Right as they were finishing up with finding Arthur's tea, Matthew's ears perked up to a familiar voice.

"...But we need to buy cinnamon rolls! They're the ideal breakfast!" Someone was saying in a perfect German accent that belonged to Matthew's one and only friend. Peeking over to the next isle, sure enough Matthew saw Gilbert. He was standing next to his younger brother Ludwig, and another tall man who looked similar to Ludwig. Matthew assumed that it must have been Gilbert's grandfather.

"Nein Gilbert, we're not getting those. Last time I bought them you ate the whole box in less than a day. Pick out cereal instead." Mr. Beilschmidt told his grandson. Gilbert sighed in annoyance, grumbling as he wandered towards the cereal section. That also happened to have been right where Matthew was watching.

"Hey, Mattie! What are you doing here?" Gilbert asked, red eyes gleaming with excitement upon seeing the younger teen.

"Shopping with my papa," Matthew answered, smiling back.

"Nice! I'm here with mein grandfather and bruder. Both of them are being sticks in the mud though. They wont buy me cinnamon rolls!" Gilbert said as he grabbed a box of cookie crisp cereal.

"That sucks," Matthew said, reaching up to straighten out his glasses. Then he turned an saw Francis watching them, and sighed a bit to himself. "C'mere" He muttered to Gilbert, and led him towards his parent.

"Papa, this is my friend Gilbert. I went to his house last week, remember?" Matthew introduced them. Francis looked intrigued, mostly due to the fact that he had never met any of Matthew's friends before. After Matthew had pulled he stunt with the knife, he had come to the realization that perhaps Matthew didn't have any friends. The boy had always been timid and shy, but he never knew it was to that extent. It felt good to know that he finally had a friend now.

"Bonjour Gilbert, it is a pleasure to meet you up close. Matthew had talked about you a lot." Francis said smoothly, taking Gilbert's hand into his own.

"Really? That's good to hear!" Gilbert said, grinning proudly. The introduction was cut short by Gilbert's grandfather calling to him, saying that they needed to hurry to the check out.

"He seems like a nice boy," Francis commented a few minutes later after they had checked out and were headed to the car.

"Mhm. He sure is." Matthew agreed.

* * *

"Alright, listen up everyone! Matthew, you're the best we've got, so you've gotta try and stay out there for as long as you can. Everyone else make sure and try to get the puck to him. If you cant get it to Mattie, get it to Sam or Kyle since they're our second fastest players. Everyone ready to win this game?" Coach Sims asked his team, who surrounded him outside the rink.

"Yes sir!" Everyone answered enthusiastically.

"Awesome! I know we can do this. Look at the other team, they're a bunch of pushovers. We can do this, and afterwords we'll all have a pizza party to celebrate!" The couch continued his pep rally. The team cheered.

"Alright then, get on that rink!" Coach Sims instructed. Matthew grinned to himself. This game would be a piece of cake. Something else made this game pretty special as well. He actually had people there to watch him!

Tino promised that he and his family would be there, but that wasn't all. Francis, Arthur, and Alfred were there too! To top it off, Gilbert had also promised to make an appearance there as well. It felt a lot different knowing that he would be watched by people that he actually knew. At first it left him a bit nervous, but as soon as their team entered the rink and the crowd exploded into cheers for their home team, he quickly found himself going back into his old ice hockey routine.

Their coach had been right, the other team really was full of pushovers. They were pretty well sized and full of strength, but that did little to nothing. There was only one small problem that had occurred. Around the middle of the game, most of the opposite players had come to realize that Matthew was the most skilled on the team. They then made him their target. One of the brutes purposely made a foul and practically tackled Matthew to the ground. He felt himself falling, chin slamming against the ice.

He could hear the crowd shouting angrily at the unfair play, but ignored them. He tasted blood in his mouth due to a split lip, but that didn't matter. The only important thing was bringing them down! So ignoring the questions of, "Are you alright?" he instead just glared, getting to his feet once again.

It didn't take very long to win after that. Needless to say, the score was 2-20 by the end of the game, and Matthew's team broke out into cheers. As they exited the rink, each player was surrounded by their own family. The first person to find Matthew was Tino, dressed casually and smiling brightly.

"Matthew, you did wonderfully! I had no idea you were that amazing on the ice! You practically took out the whole other team single-handedly!" The Finn told him excitedly, but then frowned a bit. "Oh, but you're bleeding!"

"Oh, it's alright, don't worry. It hardly hurts anymore." Matthew said, feeling a bit self conscious as he used the back of his hand to wipe more blood from his mouth. He then noticed two people standing slightly behind his therapist, and assumed that they were his family. Tino's husband Berwald was very tall and slightly intimidating, but seemed like a good man nonetheless. Then there was their son Peter, who was dressed in a warm jacket and jeans.

"This is my husband Berwald and our son Peter." Tino had introduced them. They talked for a minute or so before Matthew heard his own family calling to him.

"It looks like you're family wants to tell you how amazing you were. We should probably get home anyway, it's alright Peter's bedtime. I'll see you tomorrow Matthew, have a wonderful night!" Tino said, patting him on the shoulder before departing with his family. Part of Matthew wanted to follow them. They seemed like such a perfect family...

"Mattie! Dude, you were totally awesome out there!" Alfred said, slinging an arm around his shoulder. "The other team was full of bastards though! I wanted to go on the rink myself and beat up that idiot who hurt you."

"Thanks Al. I'm just glad we won." Matthew said, smiling a bit. Then Francis and Arthur arrived, and Matthew was instantly pulled into a hug by his papa.

"Mathieu! Mon dieu, you're bleeding! We must get an icepack for that!" The Frenchman said wordily, instantly fretting over the teen who was still in his hockey gear.

"Let's get him home and out of the cold." Arthur said, but he was grinning. "You were bloody fantastic lad."

"Thanks" Matthew replied, smiling at his dad. As they headed to the parking lot, Matthew suddenly realized something. He hadn't seen Gilbert at all, not even in the crowd watching the game. He felt his stomach and chest swell with disappointment, and quickly swallowed it down. So what if Gilbert hadn't showed up to his first hockey game? His family and Tino's family had came, and that had made his night. Even though just the day before when he was at Gilbert's house the albino had promised...

When they got home Matthew sat down at the table while Francis held an icepack to his lip, which had now stopped bleeding and was just a bit swollen. The whole time he was complimented and praised, making him forget about Gilbert...almost. Finally it was time for bed. Once Matthew was sure that everyone else was asleep (and thankfully Alfred was back in his own room now) he discarded his sweatshirt.

The scars looked as angry and puffy as ever. He lightly traced a finger over one of them, sighing to himself. Now that all the excitement had toned down, he felt that urge of disappointment and shame swell through him once again. He had messed things up so bad...so terribly bad. Looking at the scars again, Matthew suddenly began to wonder how it would feel to have his wounds open once again. Perhaps he deserved to hurt himself...after all, now his papa was on edge all the time, Arthur didn't yell as much, and Alfred actually tried ignoring his friends in order to hang out with him.

He was ruining their lives.

He scanned his room, looking for something sharp. Ugh, everything made of glass or metal that was sharp had been removed from his room. Now what was he going to do? Before he could do anything else, he was started by a sharp rap on his window.

Feeling his heart leap, Matthew stared at his window until the rapping sounded again. He then decided what the hell, and slowly opened his window, hoping to god that it wasn't some rapist or murdered. What was outside his window though, shocked him greatly.

"M-Mattie?" A voice whispered. Matthew stared into two red eyes that bored into his own. There was no mistaking it as Gilbert, but something was incredibly wrong. His face was streaked with tears, and his lip was trembling.

"Gilbert?" Matthew asked in shock, eyes wide as he opened the window further. "W-what are you doing here?"

Gilbert climbed in, wiping at his face with one of the sleeves of his dark fleece.

"I messed up Mattie..." He said, voice croaking. "I really messed up."

**a/n: Yaaay, a pretty long chapter to make up for having it take so long. I would love some reviews (;**

**Well, now it's time to go work on my Alternate Universe prequel...**

**See you soon! Don't worry, I'm going to be updating a lot faster starting...NOW! :D**


	6. Chapter 6

In a great deal of shock, Matthew somehow found the will to keep his composure. What did Gilbert mean when he said that he'd 'messed up?' Was it legal trouble? Family trouble? Surely it wasn't anything major...But then again, Matthew was beginning to doubt this, knowing a bit about the albino teen's past. Gilbert was a complete wreck, shoulders shaking and face clammy with sweat.

"Alright...," Matthew said calmly, taking a deep breath as he led his friend to sit on his bed. "Let's just both calm down Gilbert. Just take a deep breath, okay?"

"Y-you don't understand Mattie," Gilbert said through ragged breaths.

"Then tell me," Matthew ordered gently, putting both of his hands on Gilbert's shoulders. "Tell me what happened."

It took a few minutes, but eventually Gilbert started to calm down. His breathing slowed, and he used the bottom of his t-shirt to wipe off his face. Matthew then realized that Gilbert was only wearing a thin t-shirt and jeans, despite the cold weather. He got up and headed towards his closet, feeling the albino's eyes watching him as he searched for a warm blue sweatshirt. Silently passing it to Gilbert, Matthew then sat down next to him and waited.

"I really fucked up things this time, and it's all Luddie's fault." Gilbert finally spoke.

"What do you mean? Did your brother do something?" Matthew asked.

"Yeah," Gilbert said, breath getting a little shaky again. "He just had to open his big stupid mouth, that's what. I was going to go to your game Mattie, honest. It was all mein bruder's fault...and mein grandfather too."

"I'm not upset Gilbert, it's okay. Why don't you tell me about it?" Matthew suggested, trying to sound as patient as Tino could. He hoped that his attempt was at least working a little bit. Maybe it was working, because right after Matthew had spoken, Gilbert opened his mouth and began explaining.

"I guess my school principle called earlier today, and told mein grandfather that I had been skipping last period for the past few days. That's not true though, I only skipped on Friday! The principle acted like I'd been skipping practically every day or some shit like that."

"Oh," Matthew said, feeling a bit relieved. "So what, did you just get grounded or something? That's okay Gilbert, everyone gets in trouble."

"Oh no, that's not what this is about," Gilbert was quick to tell him, causing Matthew's heart to sink. "Mein grandfather then asked Luddie why I skipped. Then do you know what Luddie said? He told mein grandfather that I was probably using the time to do drugs and shit!"

"Huh?" Matthew asked, eyebrows furrowing. "But...but you told your grandfather that it wasn't true, right?"

"It's not that simple Matthew," Gilbert said with a groan. "That bastard believes everything Luddie says, since he's such a goodie too-shoes. So then he barges into my room and starts talking about sending me to military school and crap. After that, things kinda went to hell."

"What happened?" Matthew asked quietly.

"Well, I started yelling back at him. Then I just got fed up and stormed past him to go outside. I was so mad Mattie...so angry. So unawesome, right? Then since I was so pissed, I started throwing rocks and breaking the front windows. Then when mein grandfather shouted that he was calling the cops, I just took off," Gilbert explained, leaning back slightly to rest his hands in his lap. "I cant really remember much since I was so mad, but I'm pretty sure I vandalized a couple of the neighbor's houses. When I heard the cops I just ran...and now I'm here."

"Gilbert..." Matthew said, but found that he was at a loss for words. The albino then gripped Matthew's sweatshirt sleeve tightly.

"I'm in deep shit Mattie. The cops are looking for me as we speak. When they find me I'm done for...I'll probably get sent to juvy, or mein grandfather will send me away to military or reform school."

"No Gil. I wont let that happen." Matthew said firmly, standing up. He wasn't going to let something so awful happen to his only friend. Gilbert wasn't a bad person...he just needed to control his actions a little better. After all, a little vandalizing never hurt anyone, right?

"They're gonna find me eventually, and the more I run, the harder the consequences will get. I just don't have the balls to face the cops or mein family yet." Gilbert told him, his eyes bloodshot from held in tears.

"I said that I wont let it happen!" Matthew felt himself snap. Seeing Gilbert's eyes widen slightly, Matthew then drew in another deep breath. "Sleep. What we need right now is sleep."

Matthew ended making Gilbert a bed on the floor, on the side of his bead that was hidden from the doorway view. How on earth would he explain Gilbert to his parents if they found out? And he never knew when they would randomly pop in to 'check on him' in the middle of the night. As they both got into their beds, Matthew heard Gilbert whisper something.

"T-thanks for this Mattie. I owe you one."

"It's no problem. What are friend's for?"

* * *

The next morning, Matthew awoke extra early. He planned to make some pancakes to sneak up for Gilbert. After that, he didn't know what they would do. He certainly didn't want his parents or Alfred to find out. Likely they would end up telling someone. He couldn't trust them with something like this.

He left a small sticky note for Gilbert in case the albino woke up while he was downstairs, telling him to stay put and wait until he made some food. Thankfully nobody was up when Matthew had crept down the stairs. Since it was a Sunday he at least had until seven, which gave him thirty minutes.

Soon Matthew became immersed in making pancakes, the familiar smell soothing his nerves. Just as he finished up preparing a plate of perfectly made pancakes, he heard someone coming down the stairs. Matthew froze, cursing silently as he saw that it was his papa.

"Mathieu, what are you doing up so early on a Sunday?" The Frenchman asked curiously, yawning as he made his way over to the coffee machine.

"Oh...u-um," Matthew stuttered, trying to think of an excuse. "I'm not sure. I just woke up and was hungry, so I decided to make breakfast a little early today."

"Ah, I understand. One should never ignore their hunger." Francis said with a chuckle. "Well, I'm up because I have to run into work for a few hours this morning. I'll be back before lunchtime, and then perhaps we can all go out to eat. How does that sound?"

"Fine, papa." Matthew answered quickly, before staring awkwardly at the pancakes that were supposed to be Gilbert's. He didn't move for a few seconds, but upon seeing his papa's raised eyebrow he was quick to take the plate and sit down at the table. After his coffee was made, Francis then sat down across from him.

"So Mathieu, how is your lip doing? I'm glad it's not swollen anymore. Does it hurt?" Francis asked, studying the younger twin as he took a sip of his beverage.

"It's fine papa, it doesn't hurt one bit anymore," Matthew said. Then to make it look like the breakfast was his, he took a small bite from one of the pancakes.

"I'm glad," Francis replied with a smile. "I was never aware on how dangerous ice hockey is. If you didn't love it so much then I would hesitate on even letting you play. You really are very good at it though."

"Merci," Matthew said, blushing a little at the compliment.

"Well, I should go take a shower. Have a good breakfast." Francis said a few minutes later, when his coffee was drank. Matthew sighed with relief, and nodded as his parent left the room. He waited until he heard the door to the bathroom close before grabbing the pancakes and dashing up to his room.

Gilbert was asleep, but Matthew feared that the pancakes would grow cold if he didn't eat them right now. He gently shook Gilbert's shoulder, chuckling a little when Gilbert moaned something about Gilbird and not wanting to go to school. Finally he was coherent enough to recognize his surroundings.

"Here, eat these before they get cold." Matthew said, shoving the plate into his friend's hands. Gilbert look at the food, a bright smile taking over his groggy features.

"Pancakes? Nice, these are almost as awesome as me!" Gilbert commented cheerful upon taking a bite. Matthew smiled, glad to see that he was doing better than last night. Of course soon that would have to address the issue that Gilbert had gotten himself in, but hopefully they would be able to come up with an idea.

"I'm gonna have to split from here soon," Gilbert suddenly spoke up, as if he'd read Matthew's thoughts. "After all, I don't want you involved with all of this. Your a good kid Mattie."

"So are you," Matthew said, his tone serious. "I don't care if I get involved. Your my first real friend, and friends help each other. We can figure this out together...but first I have to come up with a plan to hide you from my papa and dad."

"I'll have to leave soon anyway. Likely they'll find out that I came here. Cops are good with this stuff sometimes, trust me and take my word for it." Gilbert said, eyes clouded over as if he were thinking really hard.

"Either way, I don't really care." Matthew said shrugging as he gave Gilbert a little grin. "Were in this together."

"Your pretty awesome Mattie." Gilbert said, patting him on the shoulder.

"I know," Matthew answered jokingly.

* * *

The morning passed by quickly enough. After eating Gilbert had went back to sleep, so Matthew entertained himself with a book. After they had awoken, both Arthur and Alfred had popped by to say good morning to Matthew. Whenever there was a knock on the door, Gilbert would dive under the bed.

Even Francis was oblivious to the wanted albino stowaway teen hiding in Matthew's room. After he'd arrived home, Francis had settled down onto the couch next to his husband, slinging an arm around the Brit's waist. Arthur, who had been reading, was slightly annoyed. Alfred sat on the floor below them, doing his homework so he could watch the cartoon channel.

Gilbert and Matthew were playing cards upstairs, when they heard the doorbell ring. Matthew didn't pay it any mind, it was probably one of Alfred's friends. However, a few minutes passed and Matthew heard someone walking towards his door.

"Quick, hide!" He hissed to Gilbert, who didn't need any indication to dive down by the bed.

"Mathieu, can I come in?" Francis asked.

"Sure" Matthew replied, a little confused. When Francis stepped inside, Mathew was alarmed to see a rather grave look on his parent's face.

"There are some police here who want to talk to you...something about your friend Gilbert? Do you have any idea what this is about?"

Oh shit. Matthew instantly felt his face drain all it's color.

"Gilbert? What about Gilbert?" He asked, trying to sound confused. "Does this have to do with why he wasn't at my hockey game last night?"

There. That sounded like he was innocent, right?

"I'm not sure myself. Why don't you come downstairs and we can all see what this is about?" Francis suggested, eying his son worriedly. Matthew nodded mutely, standing to follow him downstairs. Sure enough, there were two policemen sitting across from Arthur, who had just served them a plate of burnt scones. The officers grimaced at the food, but one of them politely took one of the scones. Alfred, who had been standing behind the chair that Arthur sat in, looked a little shocked.

The officer who had denied a scone caught sight of Matthew and smiled reassuringly. "Come on over and have a seat son. I'm Officer Brian, and this here is Officer Jacobs."

Matthew nodded, and took a seat on the small loveseat across from the couch. He was really starting to panic, due to the fact that he actually did know Gilbert's whereabouts. He was never good with interrogations. It was impossible to hide things from Alfred, he would always break under the pressure in a matter of seconds. This time he had to man up, for Gilbert's sake.

"We understand that you're friends with Gilbert Beilschmidt, is that correct?" Officer Brian asked.

"Yes sir," Matthew answered, looking down at the floor.

"Last night Mr. Beilschmidt caused quite an amount of trouble. He vandalized several houses along his street, and has sense then disappeared. Since you are one of the boy's only known friends, we were wondering if you had any idea where he could be?" Officer Jacobs then questioned, taking another bite out of his scone and trying not to pull a face of disgust. Arthur beamed happily at someone eating his food.

"I don't know where he is," Matthew muttered, wringing his hands together nervously. "He never showed up at my hockey game last night."

There was a silence, and Matthew squirmed uncomfortably at the feeling of everyone staring at him. Francis, sensing Matthew's discomfort, decided that it was his turn to speak.

"Please officers, mon Mathieu has been having a really rough time lately, he does not need this. If he doesn't know Gilbert's whereabouts then do not push him." He requested firmly, but kept his tone light.

Needless to say, the police ended up leaving the house not long after that. It was hard to tell whether they believed that Matthew didn't know or not, but they didn't accuse him of being guilty. Besides, they both looked happy to be away from Arthur's cooking.

"I'm sorry that Gilbert is missing Mathieu, but please know that if you're feeling upset then you can talk to us." Francis said once they were gone.

"Yeah Mattie, you still have me, the best brother ever!" Alfred added cheerfully.

"Thank you, but I'll be fine. I'm going up to my room now." Matthew said quickly, wanting to tell Gilbert what had happened as soon as possible. He quickly got to his room, but just as he was about to close his door, a foot wedged in between the opening.

It was Arthur, standing who eyed Matthew with a knowing look, as if he knew what secret Matthew was harboring.

"Listen lad, I think it's time we have a word."

**a/n: Sorry if this chapter was lame, I'll do better with the next one! I've just been sick with a horrible cold, and it's making my writing messed up. By the way, I loved all of your reviews, you guys are fantastic!:p I'll see you all soon with the next chapter!**


	7. Chapter 7

"A...a word?" Matthew asked, eyes wide with fear. Oh god, Arthur must have known! But how...Gilbert had never left the room, and they'd stayed so quiet! He didn't have time to say anything else though, because Arthur crossed the room to sit down on Mattie's bed, patting the area next to him in an indication for Matthew to sit down.

"Yes, I've put this off long enough," Arthur answered once Matthew had sat down. "Now listen Matthew, I feel like our relationship really isn't as good as it should be. I'm your father for goodness sakes, yet sometimes I feel more like just an awkward acquaintance."

"Erm, dad, I-"

"I know that I've probably been paying too much attention to Alfred rather than you," Arthur interrupted. "But that's going to change now. I've come to figure that maybe we should have one on one bonding more often. At least once a week, we could go out to eat, or see a movie, or something of the sort."

Matthew was a little stunned, but very relieved that it wasn't about Gilbert at all. He had actually really thought that Arthur had found out that he was harboring a 'criminal' under his bed. Now he was actually a little bit flattered that Arthur felt bad about not giving him as much attention as Alfred.

"O-okay. Yeah, I'd like that." He said, daring to give Arthur a small smile. Arthur returned it, looking ecstatic.

"And listen Matthew, if you ever feel the need to talk, know that you can always come to me, about anything." He added, placing a hand on his son's shoulder.

"Ah, r-right." Matthew said, looking down a little. There was honestly no way that he could tell Arthur about Gilbert. Even if Arthur wanted to be closer to him, he was still an adult and would probably act responsibly, which meant notifying the police of Gilbert's whereabouts.

Meanwhile, while they were talking, a certain albino was having some trouble. You see, he was wedged very tightly underneath Matthew's bed. Despite the rest of Matthew's room being clean, under the bed was full of dust. Gilbert felt his nose itching, and a sneeze was slowly growing. He knew that if he sneezed he was screwed, but it was getting difficult!

"So anyway, I guess that's all I really had to say. Maybe we could go see that new zombie movie tomorrow? It can just be the two of us, because I certainly won't allow Alfred to come. Honestly, the last time we allowed him to see a horror movie he was a wreck..." Arthur said with a chuckle.

"Yeah, I remember that. He refused to sleep alone, so I had to give up my blankets to him." Matthew remembered.  
"Ah, alright then, it's settled. We'll go see a movie tomorrow evening." Arthur said, standing up to let him know that the conversation was done. He gave Matthew's knee a little pat before making his way to the door. Until that is, he heard a noise.

"Mein gott...ACHOO!"

Matthew felt the blood drain from his face, and Arthur whipped around.

"I say...what on earth was that?" The elder male asked, eying Matthew's bed curiously.

"Um...uh...it..." Matthew trailed off, unable to think of anything to say. Making up excuses was always Alfred's forte, not his own. He really didn't want to make up a lie after Arthur had just been so kind to him. Sadly, it seemed that Arthur was smarter than Matthew gave him credit for.

"Has...has Gilbert been staying with you?" Arthur asked, a little stunned, but also calm.

"Y-yeah," Matthew confessed, hanging his head guiltily. "Gil, you can come out."

There was a pause, but then finally Gilbert slowly emerged from his hiding place, looking a little freaked out that he had been caught. He just stood there looking at the floor, hands shoved into his pockets as Arthur stared at him in shock.

"Oh my...it seems like we have a minor problem." Arthur finally spoke, still calmly. "Matthew, do you want to explain to me why Gilbert is here?"

Matthew took a deep breath, and then spilled out everything that had happened. After all, they had been discovered, so he might as well not hold anything else back. After he had explained Gilbert's situation, Arthur did not speak, looking like he was contemplating something.

"Well, I certainly don't think vandalizing a few things is worth going to jail for," Arthur finally said. "However, I also don't think that you can hide in our house forever Gilbert. I'm sure despite everything your grandfather and brother are worried about you."

"So...what are we going to do dad?" Matthew asked. he was a little shocked that Arthur wasn't freaking out.

"Well, honestly I'm not quite sure. For starters I think we could all use some lunch. How do ham and cheese sandwiches sound?"

* * *

Well, lunch was certainly awkward. Arthur had acted as though everything was perfectly normal when he led both Matthew and Gilbert downstairs for lunch. Francis's mouth had dropped open in shock, and Alfred had stared bug eyed. Any questions they tried to ask were just brushed aside by the Brit. Matthew really found himself appreciating his dad more every passing minute.

"Er...so. Matthew had told us a lot about you Gilbert." Francis finally spoke after he got it in his head that Arthur wanted them to act as normal as possible.

"Well no wonder, I am pretty awesome! Mattie here is almost as awesome as me. Not quite there yet." Gilbert said, quickly warming up to the family as he took a large bite of his sandwich. Matthew found himself laughing.

"At least I'm better at hockey than you," He retorted.

"You wish. I just go easy on you."

"Sure Gil, sure."

Francis and Arthur looked at each other; Matthew acted so differently around Gilbert! It was like a whole new Matthew. Once they had finished with lunch, Francis tugged Arthur into another room.

"Well mon cher? Would you care to explain what the hell is going on?"

"I'm not quite sure myself Francis. Don't worry, I'm going to deal with it. I just earned Matthew's trust though, I'm not going to destroy it!" Arthur replied.

"Even if you have to go as far as to allow our son to harbor a criminal in his room?"

"Gilbert isn't a criminal. Sometimes anger just makes us do stupid things. Besides, in my own teen years I remember vandalizing quite a few things myself, and I wasn't even in a rage most of the time." Arthur pointed out.

"That is because you were an untamed crazy punk."

"Blast it frog just listen!" Arthur snapped. "I was planning on taking Gilbert back to his grandfather's house later this evening. Maybe I'll be able to sort this whole thing out. I think Gilbert is just a misunderstood boy. Besides, don't you see how happy he makes Matthew?"

"I know. I just hope you know what you're doing..." Francis said, sighing and shaking his head.

"I do, don't worry," Arthur reassured him, giving his husband a peck on the cheek.

For the next few hours Arthur left them alone. Matthew and Gilbert watched television while Alfred went out with some of his friends. Finally Arthur decided to approach the subject of fixing things to Gilbert.

"I think the three of us should head over to your Grandfather's Gilbert. We really shouldn't put it off any longer. We'll explain to him, and I promise I wont let him have the police get you."

"Aww, do I really have to? I'd much rather prefer to live here with you guys. You make an awesome ham and cheese sandwich Mr. K."

"Really? You think so?" Arthur beamed at someone complimenting his cooking (Though slapping some bread, cheese, and ham together didn't take much skill). "Wait a minute, you're getting me off topic. Now really you don't have much of a choice here."

"It'll be okay Gil. I'll be with you the whole time." Matthew said encouragingly.

"Well...fine. I guess so, but I'm not sure if mein Grandfather is going to be too happy." Gilbert agreed reluctantly.

"It'll all work out, now come on boys." Arthur said, running his fingers through Matthew's hair.

The two teenagers followed Arthur out to the car, wondering what on earth was going to happen.

* * *

The house looked just as it always did, but somehow Gilbert felt that he didn't recognize it at all. It just didn't feel like home, despite having his own room in the house and everything. Well, one good thing with this trip was that he could see Gilbird. He was really missing his tiny feathered friend.

All three of them walked up to the front door, Arthur leading the way. The adult hesitated for a moment before knocking. Less than a minute later the door swung open, revealing a solemn faced Ludwig. Upon seeing his brother at the door though, the German boy's eyes widened.

"B-bruder? Your back..." He said, stunned.

"Heh...yeah, I guess I am." Gilbert laughed nervously. Ludwig stood there for a moment, staring at them dumbly before he realized that he was being rude.

"Please...please come in." He just, opening the door wider. "Hold on, let me go get mein grandfather. He's...been really worried about you bruder, and so have I. I'm really sorry about last night."

"Eh, it's fine." Gilbert muttered, but Ludwig had disappeared further into the house. A minute later he returned with their grandfather, a tall man who greatly resembled Ludwig.

"Gilbert, you're back." He said in shock.

"Yeah..." Gilbert said awkwardly. The older male hesitated for a moment before stepping over and crushing his grandson into a hug. "Gilbert, I'm sorry about the other night. Don't ever run off like that again, you worried me!"

Gilbert looked a little shocked to be hugged, but he didn't pull away. Finally his grandfather pulled away and seemed to really notice Arthur and Matthew for the first time.

"Thank you for bringing him back. I haven't officially met you before Matthew, but it is a pleasure. Do...do you both want to have dinner with us? There are probably some things to discuss."

"We would like that very much thank you," Arthur replied smoothly. Matthew caught Gilbert looking at him with some worry and he smiled reassuringly.

Maybe things would be okay.

**a/n: Ha, I'm finally over with my writers block! By the way, the story is kinda coming close to ending. There's maybe three or so chapters left? Anyway, thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter, you guys rock! Now I gotta work on all my other stuff too. **

**By the way, I recently started a new story called Worth it, it's about Ivan and Alfred becoming foster parents to a little Arthur, Francis, and Toris. Just thought I'd put that out there in case any of you guys are looking for something new to read.**


	8. Chapter 8 End

**Two Years Later**

"Why are you so down today Matthew?" Tino asked one Wednesday afternoon, noticing the way the teen sat; rigid with his hands clasped together tightly. The now sixteen year old swallowed and looked up.

"This is our last session," Matthew muttered, eyes avoiding his psychiatrist.

"No it isn't! We'll be meeting again in three months to check up on things." Tino reminded him cheerfully.

"Yes, but this is our last real normal session. It's scary." Matthew told him.

"How so?"

"Well, for one I'm used to talking to you twice a week. What if I'm stuck...what if I...try something bad again?" Matthew asked desperately, eyes wide as he tried to imagine himself trying to slice through his wrists again.

"Matthew, you've been doing splendidly this past year and a half. You're practically a whole different person that when you first stepped into this office. Not only is the Prozac helping, but you've also reached out to your family. Most importantly, you have friends. One really close friend in particular." Tino told him encouragingly. "And if you do get stuck, you have people to talk to now. Plus it's not like I'm more than a phone call away."

"I guess you're right. It's sort of hard not to be nervous though." Matthew said with a chuckle.

"It's fine to be nervous. Just believe in yourself though. I know you'll be okay." Tino replied, grinning. "I must say though, I'm going to miss our sessions."

"You've really helped me a lot Tino. I don't know how I can ever thank you." Matthew whispered, flushing a little. "You're the best counselor in the world."

"Thanks Matthew!" Tino responded, smiling as if he'd won a million bucks. "You can thank you by being as happy as you can. You're going to make something of yourself, I just know it. Now I think you'd better be leaving; someone's waiting for you."

Matthew followed Tino's gaze out the window and grinned. An old black truck sat in the parking lot, with the music turned up pretty loud. There was a certain albino sitting in the driver's seat, wearing sunglasses and tapping his hands in the rhythm to the music.

"Yeah, Gil can be impatient, I should get going." Matthew agreed. Both of them stood up, and Tino held out his arms for a hug.  
"Be strong Matthew. I'll be seeing you in a few months." Tino told him as they let go of each other, squeezing the teen's shoulder reassuringly. "And tell Gilbert I said hi."

"Yeah...okay. Bye Tino!" Matthew said, suddenly feeling a lot better. With that, he zipped up his sweatshirt (It was starting to get cold outside) and turned to leave. It was weird walking out of the office knowing that he wouldn't be coming back in a few days.

"Bye Matthew sweetie. Good luck!" The secretary waved to him. Yes, he had come to know a lot of people in this building. Even the janitor knew him! He smiled back at the woman behind the desk, and then stepped out of the waiting room.

Gilbert waved frantically when he saw Matthew emerge out the doors.

"Hurry up Mattie, get in! I wanna stop at Dunkin Doughnuts before we go to my house!" Gilbert yelled from the window, which was rolled down.

"Coming!" Matthew yelled back, rolling his eyes. He ran across the parking lot to Gilbert's truck and hopped in.

"So, how's Tino doing?" Gilbert asked. "I haven't seen the guy in a while."

"Well he told me to tell you hi," Matthew informed him. "I'm not going to have another visit with him in three months...I can't believe it."

"I can," Gilbert told him. "You've been pretty awesome lately. Granted, not as awesome as me, but you're getting there."

"Sure Gilbert," Matthew laughed. "Now let's go, didn't you want some doughnuts?"

As they drove, at a speed way too high, Matthew couldn't help but smile widely. He glanced down at his wrists and his smile grew. The scars were so faded that you could hardly see them. You had to look quite close to even see the outlines.

Everything was just...good. His parents always made sure to know about his life and have at least one long conversation with him daily, Alfred invited Matthew out with his friends more and pulled all nighters with him on weekends, and most importantly he and Gilbert hung out at least three times a week.

School was also better. They'd won two hockey championships in a row thanks to him, and his grades were still quite high. The teachers recognized him and said he was bound to go to a great college someday. Students always said hi to him now in the hallways, and he'd made several new friends.

It was all thanks to Tino and Gilbert. Now he had gone past probably one of the biggest life battles he would have. Of course there would be new challenges, but he wasn't alone this time.

Life was good.

(:

The end.

**a/n: **

**Wednesday's are boring, so here was something to entertain you!(;  
**

**Sorry this took so long. I did have it done, but then it got deleted before I could save...lol. Well, that's the end. I hope everyone liked it. Now I'm going to be working on my new Teacher!Alfred/Student!Arthur fic. I might also do some _Worth It_ one-shots, and also work on _Alternate_. Peace out ya'll!**


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